quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
