you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize