ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
