I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
