AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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