My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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