whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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