I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize