I CAN MOONWALK!
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize