apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
