what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
3pm strippers are depressing
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
