tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
