I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
