i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize