You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
