I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
