I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
