Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
