Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
