When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize