Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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