I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
