he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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