so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
