I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
