But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
