I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Randomize
