Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
whose ass print is on the piano?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
They are going to name an STD after you.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize