doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
