wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I want to fling myself into the sun
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
