i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
