Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize
