She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
