my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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