dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize