I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
