I CAN MOONWALK!
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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