I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
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