I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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