She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
no. you can't hotbox the world.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
