when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
