No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
