If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
