Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize