So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
