There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize