Screwed.edu
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
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