he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize