So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize