if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
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